A Truly Amazing First

Today marks the occasion of Henry's first birthday.  It's quite interesting when a birthday coincides with Halloween.  Seeing as how this was his first birthday, and he didn't care much about its theme,  Reese and I decked the house out with both Halloween and  birthday decorations.  It's not often that you will see a "Happy Birthday!" balloon floating right next to one of a giant ghost!  Henry was dressed as a fireman (again, not that he had much say in that choice) and Radha was costumed as Lulu the Ladybug Girl from one of her favorite book series.  Fortunately, my mother and father traveled here from Texas to celebrate alongside of us and many of Reese's coworkers attended and brought gifts for our boy.  It was great to see the younger children dressed in costume as it added even more excitement to the festivities.

It now seems so long ago that I first heard the news that Reese and I would be expecting another son.  At first, I was inundated with worry remembering what had befallen our Ronan and not quite sure if the parenting style I had adopted with Radha could be adapted to raising a son.  That is all in the past now and I can't imagine what it would be like not having Henry in my life for the past year.  Though it is a scant period of time in the grand scheme of things, it has been amazing in terms of what I have seen him achieve.  Once he began accomplishing his early feats, he refused to slow down.  From being able to feed himself to crawling to creeping and testing himself to see how long he can stand for, this child just refuses to stop for a rest.  I can already sense his thirst for adventure and can almost hear him asking permission to take part in many character defining opportunities in the future.  Even though I had some opportunities for adventure in my youth, I lacked the emotional maturity to fully appreciate and learn from them.  You can bet that I will be ratcheting up my courage so that I can be right there by my son's side and doing a little character defining for myself. Happy birthday, my son!  I love you dearly and look forward to witnessing and praising your future accomplishments!  You are most certainly proof that even the youngest amongst us can inspire an elder to greatness.

The Unofficial End of Summer

Tomorrow morning, Radha starts preschool.  The last three-and-a-half years flashed before my eyes earlier tonight and the realization that she is about to embark on her public schooling journey was enough to bring me to tears.  Of course, there are several upsides to this.  The foremost being that I will get to spend more time with Henry on the mornings that she attends class.  At least it will be another three years before I have to face this again.  Good luck, Radha.  I know that you won't be missing me as much as I will you but that's okay.  I know that you'll be having too much fun to think about such things.  That's the way it's supposed to be.

Over the Last Four Years...

I think about how far Reese and I have come since that day, four years ago. We have a beautiful and extremely lively three-year-old daughter and a handsome nearly three-month-old son who is just now starting to show us glimpses of his personality. As wonderful as it is having them both in my life, Ronan is still every bit as missed as he was since we received the news that we would not be bringing a new baby boy home from the hospital. No child can ever be replaced, especially your first born. I try my best to draw strength from that event. Always doing my best to think of Ronan, and the missed opportunities with him, when the stresses brought on by caring for my other two children seem insurmountable. Though I never heard his voice speak a word, he imparted upon me the desire to be the very best father that I can be to my children (though I often feel that I fall short of that). I am eternally grateful and in your debt for challenging me to give my best to your sister and brother, my dearest Ronan. You are forever loved and always remembered.

"Three. That's the Magic Number."

For almost a week now, I have been the father of a three-year-old. My little girl is growing fast. All of the cliches are true. Children really do grow up overnight. It's funny how I never really notice how far along she's come until right after celebrating her birthday. Her vocabulary and interests seem more developed than those of other children, her age, that we often meet at the various parks and playgrounds we visit. I'm certain that some people would refer to her as an "old soul" based on her likes. For instance, in the several weeks leading up to her birthday, she insisted that she wanted a Charlie Brown cake to celebrate the occasion. I attribute this to the fact that she alternated watching "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown," "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving," "A Charlie Brown Christmas" and "I Want a Dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown" non-stop for the last two months of 2011. Of all things for a then two-year-old to become enamored with, I would have never imagined it to be Charles Schulz's beloved "Peanuts" characters. I told her that was a good thing, since her grandparents are partial to those characters she would be more likely to receive gifts featuring them.

This birthday was extra special considering it was the first her little brother was present for. While the focus was squarely on her, it was nice to see him dressed up for the occasion and being cradled by all of our friends who showed up for the party. Our children are loved, and not just by us. That much is evident. It is a really special feeling to know that other people are delighted to see Reese and I as parents and to be congratulated for being so. I missed her grandparents not being here to celebrate alongside us, but that was expected considering we live such great distances apart now. Perhaps next year they'll live closer to us.

With everything that has come along with being three, I can only imagine what she'll have accomplished by the time she turns four. I hope that it doesn't get here too quickly. We've got a lot to discover together and the window for being three is small (those windows just get smaller with age). I believe that those discoveries made when magic is still magical are the ones that stick with you forever. Here's hoping that 2012 brings nothing but magic.

First Birthday Wishes...

One year ago, you arrived and were happily welcomed into our family. I know that your mother and father treasure you immensely. You made me an Uncle, a title I am so grateful to have. May your first birthday mark not only the passage of a year among us, but also a time when you strengthened the love of your mother and father to a point where it may not have been before. You are a beautiful blessing to us all and it is with great joy that I wish you a happy first birthday, Cammy.

October 31, 2011: All Treats, No Tricks

I had every intention of making this particular entry before now. However, the past few weeks have reminded me of how little free time one has--or makes wise use of--once a new child enters your life. Our third child and second son, Henry, was born on October 31st at 11:41 A.M. He weighed seven pounds and five ounces and measured 20.5 inches long. We never expected a Halloween baby, but when Reese woke me up around 8:00 A.M. that morning and informed me that she had been having contractions for the past two hours, I knew he would be there before noon. His delivery was unique in that the entire delivery team was composed of women who were all smiles and congratulations once he was safely here. Upon arrival, he made us quite aware of how well his lungs functioned, but once he was swaddled and placed in Reese's arms, he became the proverbial "sleeping baby." It was nice to see Reese as alert as she was post-delivery. There really is nothing more evident of a human spirit as watching a mother bond with her newborn child.

Later that afternoon, I was able to pick Radha up and bring her to the hospital so that she could get her first glimpse of our newest family member. Seeing how it was Halloween, I had her wear her costume (Little Red Riding Hood) and bring her pumpkin along with her. She received some treats from the nurses and another family, who had just welcomed a new arrival, offered her some "It's A Boy!" mints. She did show some interest in her new brother and even sat on the bed and held him for a few seconds before something else in the room caught her attention. After bringing her home that evening, I was able to take her to ten houses or so for some Trick or Treating. It turned out to be quite the magical experience for her and I'm quite certain that Halloween is now her favorite holiday. Late that evening, I returned to the hospital where Reese and I spent our first of a few rough nights. Thankfully, Henry slept in the nursery for a few hours of each night we were there, making the stay a bit more bearable. It's hard to imagine a situation that makes you more thankful to return home and sleep in your own bed than a few nights spent in a hospital.

Now that Henry has been home for a few weeks, I have gotten to form a greater bond with him. The love I have for him is different than what I have for Radha but I love him every bit as much as I do her and am willing to jump in front of a train to save him. Reese assures me that is normal and getting to know him better as he grows fills in some of the layers that are not currently present. Regardless, I know that I have been blessed to finally experience raising a son. That is something I have only been able to dream about since we lost Ronan nearly four years ago.

Many thoughts concerning what life will be like now that we are raising two children weigh heavily on my mind, but foremost is how grateful I am to have them both in my life. I am looking forward to the upcoming holiday season and having my entire immediate family at home. Hopefully, the rush usually associated with the holidays will be quelled just a bit this year considering our current situation. I'll do my best to focus on my loved ones and put their most important needs first. May this season truly be a most joyous one for all of us.

The Clock is Ticking...

The countdown has begun, in earnest, for our newest addition to arrive. With only two weeks to go, I'm doing my best to recall the highlights and challenges of Radha coming home with us. In the meantime, Reese and I will continue to prepare Radha for what the arrival of her baby brother means for her. In order to comfort her about the whole ordeal, we've been explaining that we will be staying at the hospital for a few nights but that I will still make it home every night to help put her to bed. She appears to be at ease with the whole process. I just hope that remains the case.

As for hands-on preparation, a few weeks ago, Radha attended a "Big Sisters Class" being taught at the hospital that Reese will be delivering at. Radha was there with a three-year-old girl, Abby, who will also be welcoming a baby brother about the same time that she does. A woman named Becky, who works in the hospital's L&D ward, taught the class. The girls watched a video about welcoming a new sibling home and then practiced changing the diaper of and dressing a doll. I'm not sure how much of the info Radha soaked in, but it was comforting to see her interested in the prospect of welcoming a sibling. Near the end of the class she decorated a t-shirt for her new brother with her own illustrations and the message "Baby Brother...Welcome Home!"

As for me, I still need to refresh my memory on what a dad should know about a new baby. Just because I've been through it before doesn't mean that I remember every little detail. Thankfully, Reese still has all of the literature we received prior to Radha's birth. I imagine that these next two weeks will go by in the blink of an eye. I better get ready.